None of your topics interest me

It's that time of year again, next-to-last semester students suddenly realize that the deadline for applying for their bachelor's thesis (a stupid thing invented in Germany as a "little" Diploma-Thesis which makes life difficult for everyone) is approaching fast.

I only advise a few people, as I want to advise them properly. And as a crotchety old professor I long ago decided to only advise students writing on topics that interest me.

Some people who did not attend my elective course on sub-field X suddenly discover that there is a lot of money to be made in X and really want to write their thesis there. I do not want to have to explain the details of tying their shoelaces in subfield X, however, so I usually refuse this request. I sometime relent, and then regret it immensely, as they just don't get far enough with their work when they don't understand the basics of the subfield.

I often have people write to me saying: "I want to do my thesis with you, but I do not like your topics. Please give me one that interests me." I get extremely irritated at this ego-centric view. Here they are, not even paying for the privilege of studying, and then making all sorts of demands on me.

I am rather a bitch to write for - I insist on weekly meetings and bringing something along to show me and to discuss. This usually means an all-nighter the night before the meeting, but it does seem to get results. I also rip what I see to shreds, being especially caustic about misspellings. We do have spelling checkers, you know.

I wish we could get rid of these theses. They don't get far in only 8 weeks worth of work, it is a job to read all the theses all handed in at the same time, and really difficult to then schedule the oral exams to accompany them. They should just get a Bachelor's degree for credits earned, and then we can concentrate on real work - Master's theses.

Happy Birthday Creative Commons!

I attended the Creative Commons 5th birthday party in Berlin this evening. One of our new students had distributed leaflets in the lab, and since I have been interested in free software and now open documents, I decided to drop by.

The student was rather shocked that I did actually attend - and knew some others attending. He tried saying that he thought it was great that one of his professors was interested in such modern stuff - I just smiled instead of telling him that I've been interested in this since before he was born.

I was surprised, however, at how very many projects there were, and that there are now 42 countries participating. Many countries are pouring real money in the project, paying people salaries to sort out the legal aspects and then making it popular.

Even the NDR, a German local TV station, has made some experimental films available under CC license (Press release, Download page).

There were lots of presents thrown out to the attendees, I didn't get one of the cool T-Shirts, but I did nab a CD with open music put out by the student union in Marburg. The cake was horribly sweet (or maybe it just didn't go well with the Club Mate I was drinking).

I left when the music started. It's not really my favorite kind of music, you can't speak with others for the noise, and old people have to get to bed at proper times.....

Women's Handball World Cup 2007

Insanely busy these past few weeks, but there is another handball World Cup on, this time the Women's.

Germany has made it's way to the semifinals, to be fought Saturday afternoon against Norway. That will be a tough game, and the way the German team is looking (losing balls, hitting the post, giving away stupid stuff) they don't have much of a chance.

But what the heck - Eurosport TV is even reporting over 800.000 viewers for the games, so with € signs lighting up their eyes I really hope that they start showing more handball on TV, period!

The view count for my blog has shot up these past few days, I finally got around to checking the log. Handball, everyone is reading my handball stuff, the men's World Cup at the beginning of the year. I have tons of hits from Romania - so to all the Romanian, and perhaps Norwegian fans: welcome!

Applying for a Professorship - Part 1

I am a member of so many search committees right now on account of being a woman and each committee needing at least 2 at our school. This means that I get to read lots and lots of applications for professorships for a German FH (University of Applied Sciences). And there are lots of, shall we say, iffy applications floating around.

I am going to start a series on this, maybe this will make my life easier.

Part 1: The application letter

A great idea is to check out the rules for the state in which the school is located. For example, we insist on 5 years work experience with 3 outside of university, experience in teaching, a degree (you would be surprised at the number of people without degrees applying for professorships!), and a proven research and publication record.

Don't make us hunt - list each of these on a separate page, perhaps making an overview. Do include information on your foreign experience and any curriculum building or gender-related projects you have done. Don't include the contents of every course you ever took in your life. It's all right to list a few hobbies, but don't go into detail on your piano teaching (unless you are applying for a professorship in piano teaching!).

Make sure your information is correct. I have seen everything from mistyped email addresses to people thinking they had a doctorate when all they had was a dottore from Italy (a bachelor's degree). Make sure the dates in your application match the ones on your letters of reference.

The address that you give us should be valid for the next few months. If you move, file a forwarding address with the post office and with us. Some not-so-amusing stories:

We gathered for a talk by a prospective candidate earlier this week. The committee was there, and about 10 students (although it was already evening). The candidate had been invited by regular mail 3 weeks earlier. He didn't show. We called around and discovered that he had been expecting us to invite him by email. So he didn't bother telling us that he had moved - he didn't receive the invitation. And now he is out of a chance at a professorship, there will be no second chance in this case.

A colleague told the story of a search committee in the same situation at the FH in X. All were assembled, but no candidate. They got a call that he was having trouble finding the school.
- Where are you? they asked.
- I'm at the train station.
- Well, hop on any tram you see going from left to right, we are just 4 stations down.
- There is no tram here.
- What station are you at exactly?
Turned out he was in Neu-X, a town with a similar name, but about 200 km away. Advice: check on a map where the school is located that you are applying to.

Spell-check your application. It gets tiring to see that people are not willing to re-read what they submit.

Do not send boxes and boxes of printed material unless we ask you to.

On the other hand, don't just send us a link to your web page and leave it at that. We don't have Internet in the room where we read the applications, and the applications are not allowed out of the room.

Since in Germany it is usual to include a picture, do have a serious one made. Vacation pictures are discouraged. Yes, it is interesting to know what a prospective colleague looks like in a bathing suit. But this will not get you on the short list, even if you are very good looking.

Avoid coffee stains on your materials.

Don't put all of your pages in separate plastic sleeves in it's own big folder. This does not fit in our filing system, and should you make the list, it is a pain in the backend to have to dig each of the pages out for filing in final paperwork.

Coming topics: How to survive the talk - What not to do when meeting with the committee - Why does it take so long for them to let me know what is happening. I will include additional topics on request - somehow I have 200 readers a day currently, but no one writes comments!

Lucia

Just had a nice Lucia celebration at the Swedish Embassy this evening. The Swedish ambassador is such a great party-giver. She invited a Stockholm choir to Berlin, 20 singers and a director, to give some Lucia concerts. They sang lots of traditional Swedish Christmas songs, dressed in the Lucia garb with one of the sopranos crowned with burning candles (see the nice Carl Larsson picture on the Wikipedia).

Of course, we were in Germany, and burning candles + crowds could mean disaster so there were ambulances parked outside, police, guards, first aid guys, and buckets of water and fire blankets. Gotta be sure nothing goes wrong.

Nothing went wrong. They sang a capella and the acoustics in the Felleshus were quite amazing.

There was Swedish Christmas food - herring, smoked salmon, caviar, cheese, Swedish meatballs, ham, no smoked moose heart though. Had that once, don't need it again. And of course, there was glögg.

Her Excellency (who doesn't really go by that name, she is just Ruth) worked her way around the room, greeting everyone, making sure they had enough to eat and drink. Yes, thanks, all that was missing was some snow!

What time is it?

I lost my watch last week. I took it off when changing for handball and instead of putting it in my pocket, I think I put it over the little knob where you hang your clothes.

Anyway, I was talking away after training and then made some remarks about all the stuff the school kids leave at school, went off for a drink, went home - and couldn't find the watch.

No time the next day to find anything, so I spun through a hectic day using my mobile phone as a timepiece. The problem is, checking the time cannot be done surreptitiously that way.

I had to race across town to a trade show, and discovered that the eastern part of Berlin has almost no public clocks, the western part at least has the occasional "Normal time" clocks on street corners. At the trade show I could check the time on everyone's computers as they explained their stuff to me. But it was so irritating not to have one's own time.

I went to the school on Friday and looked through their lost and founds. They had loads of watches, but most of them were Mickey Mouse watches. Not exactly my style.

I've made it through a week now, although not a week with a major lecture, just with my Master's seminar. I am constantly checking out rooms for where the clock are, or the people in the rooms if they have watches I can read. I've asked Santa Claus to bring me a watch, but maybe if I make it until then I won't need one any more :)

Update: Found it - it was hiding in my glove in the inner jacket of my two-part coat. I have too many pockets.....

Blóðbönd - Thicker than Water

Ahhh, this is Berlin, where you can even see films in exotic foreign languages! There is a Nordic Film Club that shows a film every other week or so, and every now and then there is an Icelandic film on.

Tonight was Blóðbönd, (literally "blood bands", but the official English title is "Thicker than Water"), a film from 2006 by Árni Ásgeirsson that for some reason won some Norwegian film award and was nominated for a bunch of others.

What where the good things about the film?

1. It was short.
2. It was in Icelandic with subtitles, so after I bit I was back into understanding Icelandic, what little was actually said.
3. They had a nice house.

The film is about an eye doctor, he and his wife are shortly to be parents for the second time, when he discovers that their first son cannot be his son. Drama ensues, which involves a lot of silent, morose stairs, lots of drinking, some vague notion of sex (he "gets even" with his receptionist) and a bit of hash. A pathetic guy having his mid-life crisis while his wife awaits the birth of her second child.

My impression was a failed attempt to recreate Bergman's Cries and Whispers, giving it an Icelandic touch. Not even the usual elements of Icelandic films (beautiful landscape; pissing, preferably in the snow; elves and magic) are here, just depressing, rainy Reykjavik. I also found the lighting very confusing, it not being clear what season this was and how many days passed. It seemed to go from fall to summer back to fall.

But anyway, it was in Icelandic after all!